Recently I’ve been getting a lot of opinions on my new tattoo. Most comments are from my family who aren’t the least happy about it. To bring people to a history of myself and tattoos: I have two. My first one is in the ancient lost Filipino script ‘Baybayin’ of the word “Family”. My most recent one simply says “Be not afraid” on my inner forearm. Note: Both tattoos are small and thin. My parents knew about my first one, as I got it with my sister and cousin as a matching tattoo. However, last week I had a spur of the moment decision and decided to get another one. It was supposed to be in my late grandmother’s handwriting but the artist wasn’t able to mimic her writing. Nonetheless, I love how it turned out.
When my father saw my tattoo he had ignored me for a week. Just yesterday he began to include me in small conversations during dinner. My mother says it looks ugly. My aunt told me that she lost all trust and hope in me. Yet I find it funny that they admire my family members who have tattoos (visible or not). However with all that’s been said about my tattoo, good or bad, I don’t mind because I love it and that’s all that matters.
I’ve said before in my “A 20 Year Old Who Is Proud Of Her Struggles And Failures” post that I’m proud of myself and that’s a pretty big accomplishment. There are reasons why I got both of my tattoos and they’re important to me–I don’t have to explain their importance to anyone in order for them to change their opinion on my tattoo. But I highly dislike that my family’s perspective of me has changed in a different way. They have failed to realize that I’m still the same person before I got a second tattoo.
I know that my family is a firm believer in “Judge a book by its cover” as that’s what I’m getting out of their whole “People who have tattoos are bad/ugly/stupid” spiel and I find that they’re close-minded people. My appearance shouldn’t determine whether I’m nice/beautiful/intellectual or not and I shouldn’t even be stressing on other’s thoughts on my outlook but I feel that I’ve got some things that I’ve got to get off my chest.
Last night I had a discussion with my sister and mother about tattoos and I feel like sharing my thoughts that went on during our talk: I’ve came to a conclusion that I love the way I look and I want to become better (I want to work on some of my flaws). I’m in the process of becoming a better version of me inside and out. These past few months I’ve been working hard in regards to being active daily, and I’m satisfied with my outcome. With being set with my appearance, I’ve also been satisfied with my mentality. I started to care less of what others had to say about me. I’m surrounding myself with people who are positive and vibrant. I’m reading more books and watching less television. I’m falling in love with music each day. I’m eating new foods. I’m laughing and I’m happy. I realized that once I’ve focused on making my life beautiful, happiness will be present each minute. And I won’t mind any negative words said by others regarding me and my life. If their words are meant to be hurtful, it’s not working at all.
I told my mom that I don’t care what others have to say about me, I love the way I look and I love the way I am. Her response wasn’t what I expected, she had told me, “Sometimes not caring about what others say isn’t the best thing. Right now you should care what they have to say”. Instead of her being supportive on that part, she was downing my self love. Regardless, I still worked up the courage and told her, “I love myself and that is the ultimate love”.
For those people who are working on their insecurities and flaws each day, start by facing yourself in the mirror each morning and telling yourself that you’re beautiful and so is your life. You will learn to slowly love yourself and one day you will embrace each flaw and learn to love it. They did say that once you accept your weakness no one can use it against you.
I know that present day it is difficult to love yourself and ignore what the media or the “haters” say, but I am positive that you’ll learn to appreciate yourself once the comments from the peanut gallery bounce off of you and return back to them. I suppose the lesson that I want you to carry on from this post is this: Haters are going to hate but don’t ever stop loving yourself; you do you.